


Family

by mysterytour



Series: Long Lost Fam [1]
Category: X-Men (Alternate Timeline Movies), X-Men (Movieverse), X-Men - All Media Types, X-Men: Apocalypse
Genre: Charles is a good therapist, Gen, Mother-Son Relationship, X-Men: Apocalypse (2016, X-Men: Apocalypse Spoilers
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2017-04-28
Updated: 2017-05-03
Packaged: 2018-10-25 01:38:34
Rating: Teen And Up Audiences
Warnings: Creator Chose Not To Use Archive Warnings
Chapters: 3
Words: 2,362
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/10754055
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/mysterytour/pseuds/mysterytour
Summary: Sometimes she watches him play ball games with his friends out on the lawn. When she passes him in the corridor she acknowledges him but is careful not to look for too long. Always at a distance. No one knows the truth, except for Erik, who is elsewhere. Except for Jean, who hasn’t said a word, but whenever they run into each other the truth is in her eyes. Raven is glad of her discretion.





	1. Chapter 1

She has agonised over the words since the first moment she laid eyes on him in Berlin. Changing word order, adding adjectives. What it boils down to is this: I am your mother, I’ve thought about you every day since the day you were born. 

Five months have passed since the apocalypse was averted. During this time Raven Darkholme has concealed her love well. When she saw it was him in that horrible cage something froze inside her, so she pretended to be a stranger. 

Sometimes she watches him play ball games with his friends out on the lawn. When she passes him in the corridor she acknowledges him but is careful not to look for too long. Always at a distance. No one knows the truth, except for Erik, who is elsewhere. Except for Jean, who hasn’t said a word, but whenever they run into each other the truth is in her eyes. Raven is glad of her discretion. 

For sixteen years she pictured him as a baby. She still can’t believe how big he is, how strange it is that his accent is different from her’s. He is more beautiful than she could have imagined. Sweeter than she could ever have raised him to be.

The time has finally come for Raven to bite the bullet. It’s a hot day and most of the kids are outside playing. She watches from her usual window on the ground floor. Kurt and his new friends: Scott, Jean and Peter, are sitting in the shade of one of the sprawling, ancient trees that dominate the landscape, eating MacDonald’s talking about whatever teenagers talk about. Peter inhales his burger and fries in a matter of seconds. The others laugh, but laughter soon gives way to annoyed gesturing when their own food disappears, too.

Raven had no such friendships when she was their age.

They get up and start walking towards the mansion. Now is her chance. She catches them as they come through the high double doors at the front of the mansion.

‘Hey, Kurt, can I talk to you for a moment?’ Raven says, nervously.

‘Sure.’ Kurt says, his eyes bright and innocent.

‘Alone, if that’s alright’

‘Certainly.’ He turns to his friends, ‘See you later, guys.’ 

Raven glances at Jean, who gives her a smile and says you can do it in her head as she leaves.

‘What is it?’ Kurt says, a little nervously.

‘Your adopted parents, did they ever tell you where you came from?’

Kurt shakes his head.

Raven draws a deep breath. Her hands are shaking. ‘I know.’

‘How?’

‘Because I…I’m your mother, actually. Sorry I didn’t tell you sooner.’ Raven is immediately embarrassed by her choice of words.

‘Oh.’

‘I thought Margoli seemed nice, and she’d take good care of you. She did, didn’t she?’

‘Yes, of course.’

‘Your father – he’s a teleporter, too. You look so much-'

Kurt turns around and starts walking away, fast.

‘Kurt – wait!' 

‘Sorry!’ He calls, disappearing with a crack and a puff of blue smoke. 

Raven stands in the empty hallway and watches the smoke tendrils dissipate. He probably needs time to process things, Raven thinks, her heart still fluttering, stomach tight and heavy like a stone. She starts walking to towards the kitchen (perhaps having something to eat will make her feel better) but stops when it occurs that that’s probably where the others went. She turns back to the door. Still open. A bird sings close by.

Raven closes the door, wondering how long she’ll have to wait.


	2. Chapter 2

For days Kurt can’t even bring himself to think about what happened, let alone tell anyone about it. He carries it around like a dirty secret, even though it’s not really a secret (or at least he doesn’t think it is), certainly not a dirty one, at that. His friends have noticed that he is quieter, more detached than usual, but only Jean Grey knows why. Jean knows everything about everyone, and more importantly she knows how to pretend that she doesn’t.

Thankfully, Raven has been away on X-Men business, but eventually she will return and he will have to face her.

It’s late – just after 9 o clock. Kurt has spent most of the day by himself in the library. The younger kids are already in bed and the teenagers are anywhere but the library. Reading in English is still challenging and tires his brain out, so he has immersed himself in one of the four German books he could find, The Neverending Story, a novel he read many times as a child. The familiarity of the words is comforting. His own copy is probably still in the trailer that until recently he shared with Amanda and their mother. Or perhaps not. He hasn’t been home in almost half a year.

The initial shock of the news has softened enough that he can begin processing it. Kurt thinks about Berlin, the kindness in Raven’s eyes when she pulled the coat around his shoulders. Kurt gets up and puts the book away. There is only one thing to do in situations like this – call his mother.

 

When Kurt arrives outside Professor Xavier’s office he knocks timidly and waits.

‘Come in.’ Professor Xavier calls.

Kurt opens the door and slips into the room. It’s warm, despite the high ceilings. Professor Xavier is working at his desk. He looks up and smiles. ‘Hello, Kurt.’

‘Good evening, Professor Xavier.’ Kurt says, politely.

‘How can I be of service?’

‘May I use the telephone? I need to call my mother.’

Professor Xavier smiles broadly. ‘Of course.’

‘Thank you. It’s an international call, will that be Okay?’

The Professor moves around the desk and heads towards the door. ‘You know, most of my students wouldn’t be so polite. Take as long as you need.’ He says, shutting the door behind himself.

Kurt reaches over to pick up the receiver and groans when he sees that it has a rotary dial instead of a pad. It takes him seven attempts to get the number right.

The person who answers is a stranger, of course. Due to the nomadic nature of circus life Margoli has never had her own number, and the current one in use belongs to a nearby café. Kurt has to wait a few minutes for the answerer to walk up to the site and find her.

There is a clatter on the end of the line, and finally: ‘Hello, my darling! How are you?’

Kurt almost tears up at the sound of Margoli’s voice. It suddenly dawns on him just how long he has been away from home. ‘I’m Okay.’ He says, fidgeting with the telephone wire, ‘I have a question. About my biological parents.’

‘Oh. You’ve never asked about them, before.’

‘I know. I wasn’t sure if I should…’

‘You can ask me anything; I’m your mother...' Margolis sigh, 'I don’t know about your father. Your biological mother brought you to me. You were so small I thought you must have been premature, but she didn’t tell me much.’

‘What was her name?’

‘I don’t think she told me her real name. She called herself something English like… Mystical?’

‘Was it Mystique?’

‘Yes. That’s what it was. How do you know?’

‘The woman who came and got me in Berlin, it was her.’

Margoli is silent for a long time. ‘That was her?’

‘I only just found out. She lives here at the mansion.'

‘Why is she living at the mansion?’

‘Because she works for Professor Xavier, I guess.’

‘But why doesn’t she live in her own apartment?’

‘I don’t know. Was she sad, when she gave me up?’

Margoli sighs, again, ‘Of course she was sad, but she couldn’t have looked after you like I did.’

‘I know, mother. I love you.’

‘I love you, too, sweetheart. Are you alright?’

‘I don’t know. I just feel so overwhelmed.’

‘Oh, precious. I miss you so much.’

Kurt swallows the lump in his throat. ‘I miss you, too. I’ve got to go!'

‘We’re moving on Tuesday. As soon as we get to the next site I’ll send you the new number.’

‘Sure. Give my love to Amanda. Bye!’ As soon as he puts the receiver down the tears start. He wipes at them frantically with his fingers but they keep coming. The door open behind him.

‘Are you alright?’ Says the voice of Charles Xavier.

Kurt turns around, ‘I just recently found something out.’ He tries to explain, his voice shaking.

‘Nothing bad, I hope?’

‘No, just… I don’t know.’

‘Would you like a handkerchief?’

‘Yes, please.’

Professor Xavier reaches into his trouser pocket and hands Kurt a neatly folded handkerchief. His eyes are full of concern. ‘Perhaps you’d like to talk about it?’

‘Kurt dabs at his eyes, gratefully. ‘May I ask, have you known Raven Darkholme for a very long time?’

‘A very long time.’ Professor Xavier nods.

‘Did you know about me?’

‘Have you spoken to her about this?’

‘Yes.’

‘I didn’t know that Raven had been pregnant, but when I saw you... I suspected…would you like another handkerchief?’

‘Yes, please. Sorry.’

‘Don’t be. We all need to cry, sometimes.’

‘I don’t know what to do about it. Do I call her “mother” because I already have a mother…’

‘Whatever kind of relationship you may have with Raven will not diminish the one you have with Margoli.’ Professor Xavier says, gently.

‘I know.’ Kurt says, ‘And I know I’m too old but I just want my Mom and she’s so far away…’

‘You’re never too old to want your mother. I still want mine.’

‘Really?’

‘Oh, all the time... All the time.’ Professor Xavier says, a faraway look in his eyes. ‘How are things with your schoolwork? I understand the mansion is your first experience of formal education.’

‘It’s Okay. Reading is hard, though. There are a lot of words, and spelling in English can be weird.’

The Professor’s demeanour brightens. ‘Yes, it certainly can be. Make sure you get an early night, tonight.’

‘Thank you, Professor, I will.’ Kurt wipes his eyes. This time, they stay dry.

 

The next day Kurt joins his friends at the breakfast table. ‘Did you know that Raven is my mother?’ He says, over a bacon sandwich.

Peter nearly chokes on his waffle.


	3. Chapter 3

Sixteen years ago Raven made a choice and it broke her heart. The pain of it had sat inside her chest like a bullet wound ever since. Until that day in Berlin. She has endured many terrible things in her life, but sitting in that doctor’s office, too devastated to speak, she thought, this is the worst moment of my life. She was wrong. The worst moment came nine months later in a pokey circus caravan when, in pain and tired beyond belief, she had slipped her baby into another woman’s arms and watched as she fell in love with him.

She remembers Margoli’s silent judgement, the Crucifix on the wall and the shitty weather as if it all happened only hours ago; breasts aching and blood trickling down her thighs as she traipsed through the mud, empty handed, furious at the rain and stupid red and yellow tents and her own loneliness.

For sixteen years that pain was the only reminder she had of her child, but in the past few days it has begun to heal. The mission lasts long enough for Raven to digest what happened and think about the future. Because there is a future, now. On the plane ride back to the mansion Raven brims with anticipation. Perhaps he won’t be ready when she gets back, but she can wait. Getting to know her own son will be well worth waiting for.

When they finally get back to the mansion she wants nothing more than to take off her uniform and get in the shower. Wearing real clothes feels strange and restrictive and is something she’s never gotten used to. She makes up an unconvincing excuse to get out of the briefing and Hank, noticing her distraction, lets it slide.

It’s not long after the end of school day and the kids are out in the hallways. Not long ago the sight of kids, especially the little ones, would have made her nauseous. On the way to her room Raven half expects to run into Kurt, but she doesn’t even see one of his friends.

It feels good to be back in her own room. She’s never had much stuff; it’s pretty much the same as it was when she moved in. Raven closes the curtains and starts peeling off her uniform.

There’s a knock at the door. Raven reluctantly gets into her robe and answers it. To her surprise she finds Kurt standing in the hallway.

‘Hello.’ He says.

‘Hey.’ Raven says, opening the door a little wider, ‘Sorry I freaked you out the other day.’

‘It’s Okay.’

‘No, I should have told you sooner. And better.’ Raven shakes her head, ‘I didn’t know what to say.’

‘Me, neither.‘ Kurt says, reassuringly.

‘You can come in. If you want.’

‘Thank you.’ Kurt steps into the room and looks around nervously. ‘Sorry I ran away.’

‘Don’t worry about it. It’s a pretty big thing to get your head around.’’ Raven says, smiling. To her relief Kurt smiles back.

‘I don’t know what to call you.’

‘Raven is fine. I know you’ve already got a mother.’

‘Okay, Raven.’ Kurt says, taking a deep breath, ‘I would like to get to know you.’

‘I’d like that, too.’

‘I was just wondering, mother said she thought I might have been born to early…’

‘Yeah, I think you were about three weeks premature. You’re hands were so tiny…’ Raven covers her eyes, quickly. He’s the kid, she tells herself, you have to be the strong one. ‘Sorry about this. Just give me a –‘ she feels his arms around her, and for the first time since he was born she holds him back. Sixteen years ago Raven gave him up and her heart was torn in two. For the first time in she knows that she did the right thing.


End file.
